I think this is cause to celebrate. I have been recognizing a trend in my posts where the hardest and lowest days have been on the days Josh is gone. Perhaps because I detected this I've been able to prepare for them more.
I noticed that having a focus (my schedule, routine, and meal plan) has helped keep me occupied and gives me purpose. Not only that but hope. Gratitude is helping a lot as well! I am not as stuck because I am pushing forward and reaching higher.
I notice myself trying to talk myself out of keeping and maintaining a routine. "It's too much work and effort, it isn't worth the trouble" "this is rediculous, look at how crazy and rigid this all is. It isn't realistic". " You really think this new meal plan is going to work?" "Look at his much you spent, and how much work this is". And on and on. Well, now j am more aware and am able to detect these voices trying to dissuade me from doing what I know I need to do.
I recognize that the initial startup , getting out of this rut is going to take a lot of effort... More than I will ever have to do in the future. But if I get the momentum going then it will be so much easier to keep going. I know I need to give myself grace...and I definitely have. In fact last night I didn't get to bed until 3 because of pregnancy, overactive brain and then Isabel woke up. That wrecks me. Thus I slept in till 10...(thankfully). I felt rested all day though and had enough energy to go to the store and keep a clean house, and cook 2 chickens and freeze, play with Isabel, going on a walk, feed her and put her to bed.
Another thing that helped me today was playing with isabel outside and exploring her world with her. Being creative and teaching her how to play. Chasing her between the trees. Collecting plants and things, talking to her and reading to her. Also having food for her to eat. Also! I bought two new shirts that fit me!! That must have made a big difference. I am also so excited about my meal plan. How much healthier we will be eating.
10 for the day
1. Isabel following my request to go pick up the sweeper, or broom after she dropped stuff on the floor. She knew exactly what I meant and went and got it and tried to sweep for me.
2. Playing with isabel outside and exploring nature with her. I have so much fun doing it. She loved it too. Especially me chasing her. The rain.
3. Getting 2 new maternity shirts from cheapskates!
4. Getting complimented on my shirt by a sweet 11 year old boy at Kroger!
5. Keeping s clean house, even though I made 2 chickens and soaking beans and no josh!
6. My meal plan!!
7. Avacado pudding!!! Thanks to the Leavitts.
8. Isabel reading a book in her crib before bed!! Looking at the pictures.
9. The library. All the sweet people who love on Isabel and think she is the cutest.
10. Prayer. Isabel seemed to fold her arms for a second when I started to pray before bed today. !!
No comments:
Post a Comment